I Don’t Give A Shit What You Celebrate Merry Christmas Shirt

  

The Jersey Devil was supposedly ‘born’ more than a century ago, when old Mrs. Leeds gave birth to an unwanted, thirteenth child at home. According to legend, as soon as it was brought forth into the world, the I Don’t Give A Shit What You Celebrate Merry Christmas Shirt shrieked and rushed out of the chimney into the night. And while I’m skeptical that that’s the way it really happened, I think there’s a grain of truth to the Jersey Devil phenomenon. Whether it is an uncatalogued cryptid or some sort of earth-roving demon I’m not sure we’ll ever know, but it has been reported by such a wealth of trustworthy sources (policemen, lawyers, attorneys, and the like) over the years that I find it hard to believe the whole thing us just contrived. I tend to think that the Jersey Devil is from a different realm; Buddhist Cosmology describes countless different garudas, nagas, demons, and other beasts. If that is the case, I think we have little to worry about, but it’s fun to speculate just the same.

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(The Bolshevik) sentinel slowly raised his head. But just at this moment the Seven Deadly Sins Elizabeth Holidays Ugly Christmas Sweater body of my friend rose up and blanketed the fire from me and in a twinkling the feet of the sentinel flashed through the air, as my companion had seized him by the throat and swung him clear into the bushes, where both figures disappeared. In a second he re-appeared, flourished the rifle of the Partisan over his head and I heard the dull blow which was followed by an absolute calm. He came back toward me and, confusedly smiling, said: “It is done. God and the Devil! When I was a boy, my mother wanted to make a priest out of me. When I grew up, I became a trained agronome in order. . . to strangle the people and smash their skulls? Revolution is a very stupid thing!” And with anger and disgust he spit and began to smoke his pipe.

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